"Morning Earl!" I greeted him with a big smile and a gladto-be-alive simultaneous slap on the back. "Looks like you lost a tenner and found fifty pence."
He gave me a withering look. "Yeah, something like that," he said, as he walked away.
(We called "Earl," short for "Early", not so much because his last name was " Bird ", but because, ironically, it was almost always late for everything.) I wondered what his problem was as I headed to the locker room to prepare for the parade in the morning.
When I got to the locker room, Earl knocked about in his locker like a petulant teenager, throw things on the shelves and out of breath while the rest of the crew Blue View ignored and exchanged light banter. when he finished, he slammed his locker stop, locked deliberately and made a dramatic exit. "What's his problem?" Scotty Gallagher asked nobody in particular.
"I do not know" I said. "it was like that when he arrived this morning. His wife just fell so maybe he could not sleep. "Earl's wife had just delivered their first baby the week before and most of the guys had the same experience for a concert to empathetic groans filled the room
The parade every man replied." There! " loud and clear his name was called until it came to Earl, who just grunted almost inaudible. The Sub agent looked straight at him and repeated his name.
"Bird Fireman are you here? "Earl had his cap on the back of his head and looked blankly into space and vaguely standing at attention.
" here, "he said an almost suicidal tone.
"well, I can see your body is here, but it seems that your brain has gone AWOL," the agent Sub responded. "I'll put half a tick -I? "he sighed and shook his head as he inserted a dramatic and tick off (real) complex named Earl.
the parade was dismissed and everyone made their way to the locker room to change into work uniform. Soon after he got there, Earl found himself surrounded. "What's the matter with you, Earl?" Asked Scotty Gallagher. "Does your wife gives you pain at home or what?" Earl was reluctant, but eventually he spat what the problem was. "Yeah, she is, "he said," and it's all because of you down *** ds. "he could see that we had no idea what he was talking about when he said sarcastically," My camera? Remember ? "
Then we remembered.
About three weeks before, Earl, an amateur photographer, had gone home and left his Nikon expensive high-end above his locker. Not wanting to miss a chance to cause harm, a few of us had borrowed the camera and took some pictures of our own choice as a joke, hoping to embarrass Earl when he got the film developed. In these days of pre-digital, the cameras used "film" that was to be developed by professionals, and the Earl of camera had about half of the 36 left shows (if you are confused, or ask your grandfather) .
We only had three or four photos to Earl would not notice, then we put the camera on top of his locker and collected the next day without suspecting anything. Nobody said a word and we all forgotten.
Unfortunately, a few weeks later, Earl of women borrowed the camera to take some pictures of their new baby. She finished the film roll and took to develop. When she received the photos, she eagerly opened the envelope while still in the store, looking forward to the photos of his new daughter. To her horror, she also found our pictures - all taken in a shower stall with lots of soapy male buttocks, hairy nipples and hands strategically placed, but no visible faces. She looked up to see the shop staff by giving it looked very disapproving. What happened on Saturday before Earl showed at work looking so miserable and he had spent the weekend sleeping on the couch and trying to convince his wife that he had not turned gay while she was pregnant.
happy 100th issue!